And there're so many things that I want you to know.

Oh. Moorgeen. In nicht einmal 8 Stunden bin ich auf dem Weg in den Urlaub. & ich bin gerade ein bisschen verliebt. In den Soundtrack von die fabelhafte Welt der Amélie. Weil er einfach wunderschön ist. Ich würde auch gerne so Klavier spielen können. Er kann es. (:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBZPa-kLLCE&feature=related

Schaut bzw. hört es euch an. (:

Gutes braucht Zeit. Das ist mir heute aufgefallen. & es gibt 1000 Beispiele. Bis ein Wein gereift ist dauert es seine Zeit. Sachen auf dem Grill sind nicht nach 2 Minuten fertig. Sie brauchen länger um gut zu schmecken. Man kann sich nicht 10 Minuten in die Sonne legen & erwarten, dass man braun geworden ist. Es dauert. Genau wie mit der Liebe. Sie braucht Zeit um zu wachsen. ♥

An meine Haare habe ich mich mittlerweile gewöhnt und finde sie auch sehr schön. Ich würde euch gerne zeigen wie es aussieht, hab es allerdings noch nicht geschafft, Fotos zu machen. Aaber im Urlaub. Am Meer. An den wunderschönsten Orten, die man sich nur vorstellen kann. Ich werde neue Leute kennenlernen & neue Erfahrungen sammeln. Was ich dazu sagen muss, ich freue mich riesig darauf. :)

Das Wetter dort ist famos. 30-36°C. Ich glaube, ich komme als Hummer zurück. Aber hier hat sich das Wetter auch gebessert.

Oh ich vergaß zu sagen, dass ich krank bin allerdings hoffe ich sehr morgen oder übermorgen wieder gesund zu sein. Akute Halsschmerzen. -.-

So unnötig wieder!

Ich werde es hier vermissen. Jeden Abend habe ich was unternommen und jetzt kommen die anderen wieder und ich muss mir neue Leute suchen. Aber diesmal werde ich das schneller tun. Selbstbewusstseinstest. & vielleicht spreche ich wieder so viel wundervolles Englisch.

Also dann.

Ciao, bis zum 2.8.

xxx

Ich lasse das Leben auf mich regnen.

Ich bin blond. Heller. & jetzt sehe ich soo dämlich aus. Ok was heißt dämlich. Es ist einfach scheiße. Weil es soo unnatürlich ist. & das regt mich unglaublich auf. Ich meine ich bin dunkelblond und habe jetzt platinblonde Strähnen. Ich seh aus wie eine Meerjungfrau. :

& es regnet. Schon wieder. Es hört einfach nicht auf. Also passe ich mich einfach mal dem Wetter an. & dann gibt es noch so dämliche Menschen die auf Anwesenheit verzichten. Allerdings habe ich gute Freunde. Das gleicht es dannn ein gaaaanz kleines bisschen aus... (;

& jetzt gehe ich gleich zum Kölner Flughafen. & am Freitag verschwinde ich aus der ganzen Scheiße hier. Italien. Ich komme. Meer & absolut keine Jungs. Ich habe nämlich keine Lust drauf. :D

Also sehen wir mal. Zumindest bin ich die ganzen nervigen Leute von hier los. Das ist schonmal das Beste. Nein, das BESTE ist das absolut grausame Wetter! Yeih, Sonne & Wärme. Everything is gonna be okay someday soon. :)

I hope so.

Goodbye. (:

I need to step outside just to see if I can breathe.

I have a new dress. And I love it. I adore it. Uhh yea. Just for 5 €. :) I can't post something special because there isn't anything. ;D

I just decided to make a list what I did each day in the holidays. I look forward to my vacation in Italy. But I think that nothing will happen in these holidays and now I think that was it for today. And I think that I think too much. :D

Love & hugs. (:

My new dress :

I wanna love you but I better not touch.

We're just doing what we always do. Finding excuses.

I do. You do. Friday was not the way I planned it. It was ok, not really bad there were just some things which fucked me. I always make the same mistake. Having high expectations. That's too much. You have to go somewhere with normal feelings. I don't think it's the best to think it's gonna be worse although it can't be worse then. There was nothing special only the same shit. I think that nothing will ever change. Some things still be the same. But so what. There are still 42 days. 14 days in Italy. Then comes the sixth grade. Only nerds come to our school. But there's my Birthday.
I figured something out. I think it's important to know how a guy acts when he's drunken. Ok it's shit and you might think it's unnecessary buut that's my opinion. It could be possible he's a slut and cheats on you because he doesn't notice anything or he's very childish and embarassing. But there are some cute guys and when I see how they act when they're drunken I just think omg they shouldn't drink that much. Some should drink smth in order to lose their shyness and there are other who have to slow down.
Tomorrow I'm going to buy a birthday present for my friend. Something special. Let's see what I find. I dunno why but I'm a bit happy but on the other hand I'm not. I could make a list why I should be that or that but it's too stressful. So I'm gonna go sleep now. It's alright, okay I'm so much better without you. I won't be sorry.
I think I lost a friend. But I'm not sorry anymore. He meant so much to me but it was only a friendship as far as I am concerned. He doesn't call, doesn't write and I think it is enough now. I don't have to run after him. So goodbye old friend of mine. The time with you was amazing and you gave me so much but i can't do this anymore. I miss you but I can block this.
Also good night everybody.
I'm biting my tongue, but I'm feeling alive and with every breathe that I take, I feel like I've won. You're my key to survival. Say my name. I just want to hear you. Say my name. So I know it's true. You're changing me. You're changing me. You showed me how to live. So just say. So just say, That you'll stay awake for me. ♥

Your hands are mine to hold.

Happy. For the moment I have everything I want. :)

My bikini, holidays and I had the party. And today there's another. & if everything will be much better there could happen one thing. But let's see. Maybe destiny thinks I'm happy enough and then that was it. But there are some other things which are making me aggressiv.

The weather. There are always clouds in the sky. And from Monday it shall rain. -.-*

My ipod. My cousin wanted to bring me an ipod touch from the usa but she offered to bring it with her in september. I said no and now she doesn't answer so I dunno if she brings it now with her.

Itunes Genius. I have to declare the creditnumber from my dad. I don't want to because I just want to use Genius and I don't want to buy smth. gr. :

I got a sms a few minutes ago. A friend of mine gave me his new base number. I wonder why. Thought, he doesn't like me. Oh yes I'll write him a postcard. ;D

So. Today it comes. Oh I didn't say yet how good my certificate is. An average of 2,2. :)

I'm very proud. 9 B's. 9 of 12. :b

Just 7 more hours. Uh quite a lot. But that doesn't matter. ;D

Fine. I think I'm ready. I just wanted to say that I'm happy.

Und manchmal ist dann für einen kleinen Moment alles perfekt. :)

♥